He lives and loves.

So as part of my graduation requirements I have to see a therapist for a number of sessions and I'm really enjoying it. Although it's tough, it's amazing the things I learn about myself. Considering I've been living this life 24/7 for 28 years it seems like I should already be an expert, but I'm not. Surprise. Surprise.

In talking to my therapist about church stuff I have to speak basically and avoid church lingo. It's tough! But I was explaining to her the other day about Christ acting as advocate for us with the father. It struck a nerve.

I met with a CPS worker and a client the other day. The Worker was following up on a report filed a few months ago about possible child neglect. I had been working at the time the report was filed, and spoke personally to the person who filed it. At the time my client was new to being a mom and in a bit over her head. My client was in the meeting scared. Convinced her baby would be taken she got very defensive and didn't articulate anything well. I was so glad I was in the meeting with her because since the initial incident I have seem her make tremendous improvement in her parenting skills. Her child is flourishing and developing really well. And I personally was not concerned by the initial report any longer, as I feel my client has worked her butt off to be a better mother.

I was able to express this to the CPS worker, explaining the evidence I had seen to support my feelings.

This whole situation made me think of final judgement. I explained to my therapist that I'm not scared to be judged because I know that Christ will be there by my side. He'll advocate for me the way I was able to do for my client, and (hopefully) he'll explain that I've been trying so hard to do my best. Not only that but unlike my client and I, I know that Christ has experienced my pains, my sorrows, and my fears. He KNOWS what I've been thru in this life and he's on my side.

Just knowing that is such an amazing gift. It gives me chills and calms me at the same time.